Wardrobe Malfunctions!

Last week I celebrated my good friend Anna's birthday. After a long day of training for work I stopped by my parents' house to pick up the birthday cake (thanks Mom!) and went downtown to meet my peeps.

It was an exciting day because not only were we celebrating the day that Anna was born, but Dina our missing friend came out! Yea!

After a dinner at Waldo's at the Covent Garden Market we walked down to the Galleria (I refuse to call it by it's new corporate name!) to catch the flick "It's Complicated". Before the movie I visited the restroom, as usual. Unfortunately as I was leaving the restroom I was moving super fast...the movie was about to begin and I didn't want to miss anything.

But as I passed the door way I grazed the latch where the door closes, it caught on my pants and I heard a big "RIIIIPPPP!".

Yes, from hip to mid thigh my pants ripped. Luckily it was on the seam so my seamstress is tending to the ripped pants as we speak.

She knits for me, bakes my friend's birthday cakes, I am a lucky daughter!

Naturally I felt a little silly, especially when I walked home downtown with my pants split. So, when I spied this video I didn't laugh, but I did feel a connection with the bobsledder. Dear, I know how your feeling!

Yes, It's Been A While...Check This Out.

Engineering Quote...

Sheldon: Engineering—where the semi-skilled laborers execute the vision of those who think and dream. Hello Oompa-Loompas of science.

~ The Big Bang Theory

A Survey Done By My Youngest Sister...

Sometimes I think my sister is the most hilarious person. Ever. Check out her answers to a Christmas survey...

Christmas Fun

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper!!

2. Real tree or Artificial? Absolutely REAL. I pity those children who have to grow up on decorating fake, perfect looking, no smelling trees *cough*Rachel*cough*

3. When do you put up the tree? I'm pretty sure in the next week and a half or so :0)

4. When do you take the tree down? If I had my way, never

5. Do you like eggnog? Have never had it, on account of the fact that if I did, my tongue would swell to the approximate size of my head. So I think I'll avoid that experience.

6. Favorite gift received as a child? I remember I got my first discman, it was like, metallic purple and I played my Destiny's Child cd in it. I was the shit.

7. Hardest person to buy for? I would say Mom or Dad. Though as long as you make Mom happy, Dad is too, so it's really just Mom

8. Easiest person to buy for? Either of my sisters

9. Do you have a nativity scene? Yep, I made on in like, grade 3 or 4 and they had these wooden figures that we coloured with makers. Yep it looks as nice as you would imagine.

10. Mail or email Christmas cards? Maybe email?There are actually some really cute ones you can find online

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? That's hard, I feel grateful for any gift I recieve as I know there are some people in the world who don't even get anything.......probably some jewellery from Claire's that I got in highschool

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? Elf, or Christmas Vacation, or The Grinch with Jim Carey, and I also love all the old specials that they show on tv.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? I actually started early this year, like, middle of November

14. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Any kind of cookie, and turkey, mmhhhmmm

15. Lights on the tree? Yes! But NOT those dumbass LED lights that don't even light up, they're just already coloured. I love the tiny ones that are really bright and it looks all glowy. (see what happens when you mess with my routine mom and dad? Bring back the OLD LIGHTS!)

16. Favorite Christmas song? All I want for Christmas is you, Have a Holly Jolly Christmas by Burl Ives, and any one sung by Harry Connick Jr., Josh Groban, Frank Sinatra, and Bing Crosby

17. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Home Home Homeee!!

18. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph (not gonna lie, I just sang the song to myself like, 3 times to make sure I got it right ahaha)

19. Angel on the tree top or a star? Silver glitter star!!

20. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?Christmas Morning, after breakfast and stockings and all that jazz

21. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? The ruthless shoppers who get in my way while I'm trying to do my job. F@#$ off.

22. Favorite ornament theme or color? Mmm, I love all the ones we got at Disney World

23. Favorite for Christmas dinner? Turkey...mashed potatoes, gravy....mmmmm

24. What do you want for Christmas this year? Edward Cullen

Ew!

Today's a bad day- but this video made me smile, then caught me by surprise.

Enjoy.

This Is How I Want To Go...

Alright, so there's this guy in Grand Rapids, MI who bowled a perfect (perfect 300!) game of bowling not to long ago.

And right after the high fives, he dies of a massive heart attack right there in the bowling alley.

What?!

Maybe that's how I'd want to go...at least I can reassure myself that it would be a long time from now since at the moment my all time bowling record is a 47.

Check out the story:

Bowler collapses and dies after rolling 300 game

RAVENNA, Mich. (WZZM) - Teammates in his bowling league think after rolling a perfect 300 game Don Doane's heart just gave out.

"You get nervous shooting a 300," says teammate Todd Place. "The pressure keeps building," says bowling alley owner Jim Nutt.

Minutes after achieving the life long goal of a perfect game the 62 year old bowler collapsed and died at Ravenna Bowl in Ravenna. "Don just collapsed," says alley owner Nutt. " At first we thought he just fainted." "Then when I rolled him over I realized it wasn't good," says teammate Place.

The teammates say he was giving a high-five minutes before. They tried to revive him but Doane never spoke another word. He died of what was apparently a massive heart attack "He looked fine, reached across the table and gave me a high-five and he fell over," says Place.

"I think he died by the time he hit the floor." Don Doane was a member of the "Nutt Farm" bowling team at Ravenna Bowl for 45 years. His teammates says its strange not to see him on league nights.

"It was like a book, a final chapter," says Place. "He threw his 300 game with all of his friends, gave each other high-fives and it's like the story ended. He died with a smile on his face."

"Don will be a legend," says Nutt. 'It's something that will never be forgotten as long as people bowl here." Ravenna Bowl is planning a memorial ceremony for Doan's' wife Linda and son Chad.

Phil Dawson, WZZM 13 West Michigan

Banners That Make Me Smile

This made me laugh the same way The Bachelor reality TV show does...with a little sadness because people actually believe in this crap.

The day that teaching abstinence only is more effective than giving teenagers real and practical information about safer sex is the day that I will gladly eat one of my shoes.

Laughing Quadruplets For Maggie

Courtesy of My Dad

Don't forget the debate is on tonight!



Post Turtle --

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75-year old Texas rancher, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to Sarah Palin and her bid to be a heartbeat away from being President.

The old rancher said, ' Well, ya know, Palin is a post turtle.'

Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was.

The old rancher said, ' When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle.'

The old rancher saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain.

"You know, she didn't get up there by herself, she doesn't belong up there, she doesn't know what to do while she is up there, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put her up there to begin with."

Courtesy of Annie

We all know how much she loves her Disney flicks, here's another one...although I'm not sure if this is family friendly. More like terrifying, and vomit-inducing.

Stewart On Palin

I have been trying to find a place where I could see this clip that everyone's been talking about for the past two weeks.

And it's brilliant. Truly, it shows what a douchebag Karl Rove and his cronies are.

Sexism is alive and well...lets see how the rest of their circus goes...

Reba McEntire : The Original Video Goddess

Mom, Annie and I were in the car yesterday when I recalled a video done by Reba McEntire. It was probably the most memorable video she ever made for me, and that's considering how fantastically cheesy they usually are.

I promised Annie I would search for the video and post it in all it's cheese glory.

Unfortunately the people who posted this gem have disabled the embedding option, so instead I give you a link to see Reba McEntire's "Is There Life Out There".

I wonder why I love this video so much. I have no clue.

All I know is that the concept is vaguely familiar (i.e. mom goes back to university), but that's where the similarities end.

I've always had a soft spot for music videos with dialogue in them, and we have Ms. Pat Benetar to thank for that, I believe.

Couple all this with Reba's fabulously frizzy red hair and it's a gem. Really all her videos are amazing, I'm sure I'll be posting those soon.

So, pleasepleaseplease check out the link- it will not disappoint. We need more music videos with story/dialogue/message/crotchety old man/etc.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7Bd3y_Ip4Q

p.s. Check out the above tiny pictures. The depict the scenes where Reba screams at her video daughter for spilling coffee on her essay, prompting Reba to state after getting the paper back "I think I learned more from the stain." *sniff*sniff*

Maybe This Will Work For Maggie's Class?

Teacher rewards pupils with signed photos

A handsome teacher in China is offering pupils autographed photos of himself to encourage them to work harder.

Ji Feng, also vice principal of Zhiyuan Foreign Language Elementary School, is so popular among students that a lot of them were asking him for pictures.

"I came up with the idea of giving them my signed pictures as a reward," he told the Nanjing Morning Post.

Students who put in exemplary work can now pose for a picture with Ji who then signs the printed photograph.

Ji added: "It absolutely is not narcissism, but a way of encouragement. And only the students who perform the best can get such a reward."

Ji said three students had so far submitted work good enough for signed pictures - but he hoped to give out many more.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Eat it, Cyrus.

Let's Get The Tiniest Kid We Know And Try This!

I can identify with the older sister. Standing by, freaking out because of the careless and wiry little sister.

Seriously dangerous...seriously hilarious.

Spelling Bee Moments...

I love this kid-

Just what a speller should be, having a good time.

Something to Ensure My Fear of Escalators Remains...

I have always had an irrational fear of escalators, but this video is intriguing.

It makes me want to take my tiniest friend and see if this really could work at Masonville Place.

Needless Machines

I'm a fan of the useless machine- not useless technology, that's different.

And recently I've rekindled my childhood interest in Rube Goldberg machines.

At engineer camp I was awarded the "Most Creative Ideas That Never Work" prize for my Rube Goldberg machine. This just further emphasized that engineering stifles creativity.

Is This What My Dad Is Like At His Office?

Ok, so I'm temporarily obsessed with The Office, the US edition. Partly because of Steve Carrell and partly because I'm oddly drawn to Rainn Wilson's character, Dwight K. Shrute.

I think it's because Dwight reminds me of my dad and what he might be like to work with. Since I've never actually been to my dad's office (the whole security clearance thing is oddly Orwellian), I can only hypothesize that this is what it may be like. However, I only think my dad would be exactly like Dwight K. Shrute if he were not married to my mom and still living with his parents. Luckily my dad is a bit cooler than that. If he wasn't married and living with his elderly parents I do think that people would confuse him for a more portly and bald Dwight.

Enjoy, Annie.

Spelling Bee Moments...

Better than "Do the chickens have large talons?" moment.