Getting Wheels

So because of the new job and the intense driving around I will be buying a car.

Am I excited about this? Yes and no.

I like to drive, the bus is slow and cold, but I like my money.

But unfortunately the decision was made for me, so last night Dad and I went to a few dealerships, drove a 2007 Ford Focus XZ5 (very nice), and I'm going out again Friday night...maybe Annie will come with???

When I get the beast, I'll let you know. And no, Maggie can't drive it.

I'm Getting Wheels

Alright, so because of a clarical snafu, I need a car for my new job.

It was supposed to be put in the job ad, but it wasn't. So imagine my surprise when I was told I couldn't use a company car (because of the grant specifics).

So, as I have to roam around Western Ontario I will be going to dealerships tomorrow with my Dad.

I don't know what's more painful, having to dole out the cash for a car, or having to deal with my Dad's high standards when it comes to purchasing a car.

Here's how it goes:

Me: I just want some wheels that won't break down.

Dad: What do you want?

Me: The cheapest thing that won't break down.

Dad: But what is it that you want in a car?

Me: Cheapness.

Dad: This is your escape! You're wheels! You have to think about what you want!

Me: I know what I want. To not spend a lot of money.

Dad: What do you want?

Me: Cheap. Wheels.

End Scene.

First Week Of Being A Grown Up

Alright, so last week was my first week at Western Area Youth Services as the Project Coordinator of RISE (Reducing Incidents of Sexual Exploitation) for Youth.

I have my own office, business cards and a whole lot to do.

My main job will be public education about sexual exploitation of youth...what that you ask?

Well, I'll tell you.

Sexual exploitation is when anyone trades anything with anyone under the age of 18 for any type of sexual favour.

Some people unwittingly call this youth or child prostitution. By law this is child abuse, so it should be treated as such, so don't call it prostitution. It's abuse and against the law.

You may think that this only happens in developing nations like Thailand, but the reality is it's happening more and more in Canada.

From experience I can say that this is a silent epidemic in Canada, London is running rampant with exploited young people. Sometimes their street kids, but there are just as many kids trading stuff for sex in the suburbs as downtown.

With this phase of the project I will be responsible for ten different counties...yes count 'em up:

Essex
Chatham-Kent
Lambton
Middlesex
Elgin
Oxford
Perth
Huron
Grey
Bruce

Yes, from Windsor to Owen Sound, I'm on the case to help exploited kids everywhere.

We've even got ourselves a MySpace page, check it out:

www.myspace.com/riseforyouth

Ants In Your Pants

Feet Still Hurting Me

Here we are at the creepiest building in Montreal, The Insectarium.

This was by far the weirdest and coolest exhibit there, those are ants walking across the branch...!

Le Stade

Can you tell my feet hurt?

Dad and I went to the Insectarium and Botanical Gardens on our last day in Montreal.

My feet felt as though they were going to fall off.

Then he asks me to climb on a frozen metal bench and pose for about 16 pictures.

This was the nearest I could get to a smile.

Sorry Sisters

When I was in Montreal I learned quite a bit.

I learned that the big sales happen the end of January, beginning of February...

And I'm talking big sales, 50% to 70% off.

Too bad it's totally lost on me.

First Week Down

Alright, so after a relaxing week in Montreal (a.k.a. the coldest place on Earth) it was time to get down to the business of having a real job.

When I was in Montreal I tootled around, got to know the Metro system, went to the Insectarium, Botanical Gardens, ate bagels, did some shopping, walked up and down St. Denis Street, explored Vieux Montreal, ate crepes, got locked out of Cathedrale de Notre Dame (could they tell that I don't go to church anymore?), got chillblains every night, ate smoked meat, walked around underground, spoke French, slept in, and went to the Biodome.

All in all a pretty good week with my Dad.

Above you will see a picture I took at the Rainforest portion of the Biodome of two monkeys grooming each other. I call them Annie and Maggie. I think it's fitting.

At the end of the week I decided that I could live in Montreal, but not in the Winter months.

"And some places you been before are so great that you don't ever mind going back. Some places you been before you don't ever want to go back, you know, like Montreal in the Winter."

~M. Freeman

Blog's Back Up

Alright, so after my Dad messed up my browser I couldn't access my blog, but rest assured he fixed the problem and we're back up and running.

Arrived!

Alrighty, Dad and I have arrived in Montreal!

We're at our hotel right beside McGill University.

Tomorrow the vacay begins! We took the train down this morning and had a nice ride in VIA 1!

Very different from what I'm used to, I'm used to travelling VIA regular like a mere peasant. I got a full breakfast and lunch. And booze!

It was packed and for a few hours we shared our four seater with a toddler. Luckily she didn't get annoying until the end.

Besides that there were some women who tried to mess with us and get us out of our four seater with the table. Screw you. We ain't moving. And we didn't. We sent them packing for the regular seats.

There was a slightly strange guy who shared the fourth seat with us in the four seater. A bit of a TMI (too much information) kind of person who wanted us to know he was tough despite looking like he was 120 lbs. soaking wet. As well, he sufficiently freaked us out when he listened to his CD player (yes, CD player) and sang his emo music.

Anywho, we got to Montreal safe and sound, tomorrow I venture out on the Metro!

What The Heck?

Ok, I'm flipping through the channels and I see my friend Oprah.

Normally I wouldn't stop, but today she's interviewing a Muslim woman. Interesting enough.

This woman is talking about her faith and the similarities to Christianity.

Then Oprah asks,

"Do Muslims believe in God?"


WTF? Are you kidding? Do you believe in God???

What the heck?

Argh.

I GOT THE JOB!

W00T!

So the big news is I got a full time grown up job!

Yes!

Starting February 5th I will be the Project Coordinator of the RISE (Reducing Incidents fo Sexual Exploitation) for Youth, the same project I helped create last year when I was a student at WAYS.

My job will include lots of public education surrounding young people in the sex trade (what people mistakingly call "youth prostitution"). And I'll be travelling all over Western Ontario!

As well, I'll be heading up the team creating new posters (the one on the left was what we created last year) and a video game.

Besides that, I get my own office, and I'm in the process of picking out a new laptop.

Best of all, this means (drum roll please) I'm moving out! I love my parents, but trust me, it's time.

Yea!

News!

Big, Big, BIG news!

Come back here for updates or visit:

http://www.mindyourmind.ca/mind-tools/play-stuff/sfs-quiz.htm

For a clue!

Run, Don't Walk.

Ok, so during my hiatus from blogging my fabulous parents gave my sisters and I an equally fabulous gift.

Dinner at Jump, a night at the Intercontinental in T.O. and...TICKETS TO SEE WICKED.

HOLY CRAP.

Now, I'm a fan of musical theatre, I don't find it odd or bizarre when people start bursting out into song, there's something reassuring about it. No matter what's going to happen, you know that someone is going to start singing a catchy tune in a minute or two.

Sigh. It was fantastic.

For those of you who aren't in the know about musical theatre Wicked is a fabulous musical that originally starred Kristen Chenoweth (of You're A Good Man, Charlie Brown) and Idina Menzel.

Menzel won the Tony for her performance as the Wicked Witch of the West in Wicked, and she's married to Taye Diggs. Sweet deal.

Anywho, Wicked is freaking amazing. It tells the story of the Witches of Oz. Let's just say that the age old stereotype of the ugly witch being the mean witch is broken. Beautiful!

So, if Wicked makes an appearance in your town, which it will. It's immense popularity means it will start touring North America a la Rent. Run and get tickets.

We were in second row (which I don't recommend for young children or people afraid of flying monkeys, like my mother), and it was FANTABULOUS.

Great music, very funny and an awesome message.

P.S. If you liked Rent you'll recognize Elphaba's voice, it's Maureen.

Back To Work!

Alright, so after some nice time off at home I, as well as Tracy, are back to our regularly scheduled lives.

Happily, Tracy was in London last week and had an angioplasty. It went well, the surgery, that is.

If you don't know this woman and are ever in charge of making sure she stays put long enough to recover, here are some tips:

1. Keep Her Hydrated: This is a helpful tip whenever anyone is in recovery, however, be warned of frequent trips to the bathroom.

2. Sugar Levels: I learned last week that your optimum sugar level should be at a 7. Let's just say she was working her way towards that figure.

3. Bruises: I don't know what it was with this woman, but she likes to show me her bruises. That was a little much. So if you're helping her out, please be warned that she might gross you out.

4. Keep Her Down: This woman has an uncontrollable urge to get up and try and help out. This is annoying. Keep her down. I did this by lacing her tea with a sedative.

5. When She Starts Getting Loud Take This As A Sign: Alright, when she starts talking loudly, making me uncomfortable, bringing up my career aspirations from my childhood I know that she's doing better.

Feel better!!! And stay off your feet!!!

Reasons I Love My Grandma

There are few people in the world that are like my grandma. In fact, I would dare to say that she is an original.

Here are some of the reasons that my grandma is like no other.

1. Two words: Class Act.

2. Extremely Clean: This could make some feel weird, but in her house it is very welcoming.

3. Great Memory: She doesn't forget anything. Anything.

4. Great Estimator: If you ever dare to watch "The Price Is Right" with my Grandma, be warned- she'll kick your butt.

5. Yummy Food: If you ever get to have food at my Grandma's house I strongly suggest trying the Frozen Raspberry Pie. And if you ever see her baking a Carrot Cake BACK OFF. It belongs to me (it really is amazing, it has pineapple in it).

6. Her smell: She smells good. Like peppermints and perfume. And a bit of cigarette smoke. And since smell is one of the most memorable things a person can have, it's very important.

7. Mental Stability: She has five kids, and trust me they could test the sanity of anyone. But somehow she is has kept it together. And for people who know her oldest three, she should be given a medal.

8. World Traveller: Alright, despite her admission that she likes to stay close to home, my Grandma has been everywhere. She's seen a lot.

9. Risk Taker: Many reasons to be a risk taker. She's travelled to Australia (very cool), held a koala (and those things can be as vicious as they are stupid). Also, see #7.

10. Zen Like Quality: She's married to a serial wanderer yet she always knows where my Papa is...It's like she has Grandma GPS.

11. She's Quick: Tonight my dear Grandmother tricked me. Told me she was going to Chicago, did I want to go? Yea! Totally! Why are you going Grandma?..."I've got tickets for Oprah."

12. She Can Be Evil: See #11.

All in all, she's cool.

And now she knows that when she crosses me, I will blog about her.

Shoveling The Day After Maggie Leaves

Ok, so everyone knows that here in London we had a green Christmas.

I didn't mind so much (Annie's complaining could be heard in Oxford County) because this meant no shoveling.

And when I was driving Maggie to the airport in the rain she commented on how funny it would be if it snowed enough the next day to have to shovel it from the driveway.

Wouldn't that be funny? Because she and Annie hadn't done any shoveling at all during their stay.

Well, the next day wouldn't you know I was out there shoveling. And cursing my sisters.

So thanks Mags, I appreciate your "help".

The one thought that consoles me is the knowledge that had the both of them been at home during any snow fall we ALL know that neither one of them would have picked up a shovel.

P.S. This is my 101st post on my blog! W00T!

Why I Dislike Oprah, Pt. 2

Ok, so I know I make enemies with my statements about Oprah, but seriously this woman is irritating me.

I can appreciate that she wants to unload her ridiculous amount of cash. Very admirable, since no one, and I mean no one, can ever deserve to make $1.5 billion dollars.

I can even appreciate that she sees a need in South Africa, you'd have to be blind and an idiot not to.

However, Oprah's gift tends to leave a bad taste in my mouth. Why is that? She's given $40 million dollars to create this school for girls, undeniably the most vulnerable population in Africa. To create true equality and to end the evergrowing AIDS epidemic gender inequality is the issue that holds this goal back.

Yet still, Oprah's "gift" makes me want to wash myself everytime I hear about it.

So let's break it down, shall we?

1. Selection Process: Let's start with the way Oprah chose the young girls who are going to her school. She picked the best and the brightest, the ones who were able to perform. The young girls who were living in the worst poverty, with the most violence or with the least bit of advantage were not chosen. Oprah (and presumably her team of experts) got to choose the smartest girls (with probably the best stories) to do what? Should I even type it? To make the best episode of "The Oprah Winfrey Show". This playing God with these girls lives is a bit distasteful.

2. Re-colonization: Alright, this is an annoying item that seems to be happening on a daily basis in Africa now. One of the biggest problems with African state independence was that the countries that had so brutally colonized them in the past picked up and ran (not walked) back to Europe. They left Africa as a collection of countries who hadn't governed themselves in centuries. As a result, leaders like Amin, Mugabe and Kadaffi emerged. Now, the logical response would be that Africa has to learn how to govern themselves (with a hand up, not a hand out from the countries that destroyed their infrastructure). However, in today's messed up world of "saving" poor little Africans we seem to see to be re-colonizing them. African countries need to be providing health care, education and housing to their own. How do we do that? Well, it's not with rich Westerners coming in like a knight on a horse and telling poor Africans what they need. This drives me crazy. Having people with money do what they want in countries that are experiencing such severe poverty that they have lost their voice does not empower them. I don't disagree that these students should be going to school, but I do disagree with how people (namely, Oprah) go about doing this.

3. What about American high schools, Oprah?: Alright, so Oprah was recently asked why not give cash (in addition to) to schools in America. Her answer? Students are more interested in owning sneakers and iPods than getting a quality education. Um. Ok. Right, superficial desires cloud the minds of your nation's youth. Absolutely. They have unrealistic expectations of what they need, what they deserve, what is necessary. There is an increasing sense of entitlement and selfish- Oh, wait, hey Oprah, when's your "Favourite Things" episode airing again? What's that? Next Fall? Ok. Where was I? Right, selfishness and arrogance- wait a second, hey Oprah, when are you going to give away "free" cars to needy people in an attempt to turn your entire show into a commerical for GM again? Uh huh, ok. Where was I again? Oh yes! How dare the youth of America feel like they deserve extravagant luxury, where would they get an idea like that? Ridiculous.

4. The Oprah Winfrey Academy: Ok, she named the freaking school after herself. I understand that $40 million is a lot of money, but how does this empower the community? How does this allow the community to take responsibility of the school? What's that Oprah? Better ratings, you say?

5. Are the makeovers necessary?: Alright, I can appreciate the dorms, the indoor plumbing, the gym and labs. But what's the connection between all of this and including a beauty parlour in your school? What the hell?

6. A star studded premiere: Why was Mariah Carey at the opening? To inject her dosage of crazy into the school? To scare the children? Please someone explain to me, without fawning over Winfrey like she's the second coming.

7. Oprah Fear: Oprah fear is running rampant. Apparently if you give away a small portion of your fortune (that you will surely make back with all the advertising and the funds you make from selling your soul) and mention at any available point that Maya Angelou is your close friend no one will look at you objectively. What the hell is this about? If you're going to have over 1 billion dollars you're going to have to be a bit responsible with how you spend that money.

I feel better now.

She's Frickin' Hilarious

Ok, so I know that Annie is going to hitch hike back to London to give me the beats for posting this darling photo, but she hassled me so much about no updates, she deserves this.

"My legs are so hairy they don't feel hairy anymore."

~Annie Rodger

The Miracle of Hanukkah According to My Littlest Sister

Alright, so you all know that Annie is one of the smartest and funniest women around. But, did you also know that Annie is a Jewish scholar? Me neither.

Which was why I was so surprised to hear that she understood the story of Hannukkah.

According to the Hasidic expert herself, Hannukkah is the celebration of when the Angel Gabriel came down from Heaven (yes, Heaven) to tell the Jews that Mary was pregnant with Jesus.

Yeah. I thought the same thing.

But we'll ignore that thought and remember that she's Annie. And we love her. Even when she tries to re-writes two millennias of history.