What A Surprise...

Virginity Pledge Doesn't Stop Sexual Activity

Washington (ECN) - A new study has found that a virginity pledge by teens does not stop sexual activity at all.

A new study was carried out by researchers at the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health to see if a virginity pledge was actually meaningful from a teen.

The pledge would mean they would not have sex until they were married.

They discovered though that over 50% of teens who made the pledge were sexually active before marriage.

There were no differences in sexual activity when comparing those who made the promises and those who did not.

Those who made the pledges were 10% less likely to take birth control precautions.

The study has been published in the journal Pediatrics.

What Does $1.41 Buy You?

It seems as though I was stiffed when I worked (ever so briefly) for Elections Canada this past Fall.

And I was reimbursed for what was mistakenly taken from me, and it totals to a whopping $1.41.

Seriously, I have a cheque made out to me, for $1.41.

So my question is: what can a person now buy with $1.41?

Just a question...

Here's what I can spend the cash on:

-Toll of the Port Authority from New York to New Jersey
- Gallon of gas in Ortonville, Michigan
- A Copy of "Let's Look At A Puddle" from the Christian Home School Online Book Store
- One portion of "Gabriel's Love Potion" from Keen Erotica

Good news is, according to the book "Wal-Mart: The High Cost of Low Prices", 9 of the retailer's top 15 selling items are under $1.40. Hmmmmm. Perhaps this is an elaborate plan between Wal-Mart and Elections Canada to launder some cash...I wouldn't put it past them.

The Girl Effect

Heather Mallick's Interpretation of Sean Avery's "Sloppy Seconds" Description of his Ex

CAUTION: This post contains sexual references :-0

Alright, I was just reading Heather Mallick's recent piece on CBC about the whole Sean "Douchebag" Avery's disgusting remarks about his ex-girlfriend (and former Popular Mechanics for Kids host!) Elisha Cuthbert as "sloppy seconds".

I laughed out loud, because it seems as though Heather misinterpreted the meaning of "sloppy seconds".

Here's an excerpt:

Seconds on radio

I only mention this because I was on a CBC radio program last week called The Point, in which I and several men discussed, well, the point. Was hockey player Sean Avery punished excessively by the NHL for publicly referring to his ex-girlfriend as "sloppy seconds?"

I was warmed by the unity of the group. We agreed it was hypocritical in the NHL world, which is misogynist by nature, to ban Avery for six games. I even defended Avery, saying I didn't think his remark was extreme, especially compared to what this hopeless thug regularly says to players and female fans. The guy was just hurt, I said.

Done and dusted.

Flash forward to that evening. I read a kind message on my CBC e-mail from a woman listener who agrees with me about the Supreme Court's EI decision. Er, just between you and me, she wrote, you do realize that Avery's phrase refers to "a woman's vaginal opening being enlarged by having multiple sexual partners."

Huh?

I stormed (I really did) into the living room where my husband was sitting. "Stephen," I said. "Does 'sloppy seconds' mean 'a woman's vaginal opening being enlarged by having multiple sexual partners'?"

"No, I believe it refers to having sex with someone when there's semen in the vagina that is previous, so to speak…"

"Oh is it," I said. "And you let me tell a national radio audience that it was kind of sweet to refer to your ex that way?"

"What did you think it meant?"

"I THOUGHT IT MEANT CHRISTMAS DINNER LEFTOVERS! I THOUGHT IT MEANT TURKEY, MASHED POTATOES AND GRAVY THE NEXT DAY! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME IT MEANT SEX PUDDLES?"

"But when you told me that you thought the Avery thing was a big overreaction, I just assumed you were being very liberated. As you usually are."

Here's a link to the whole article:

http://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2008/12/12/f-vp-mallick.html

Engineering Quote...

Sheldon: Engineering—where the semi-skilled laborers execute the vision of those who think and dream. Hello Oompa-Loompas of science.

~ The Big Bang Theory

Harper's Speech from the Throne A.K.A. "I Am A Prime Minister King"

I am the Canadian man of the hour,

using all legal means to retain my power,
to manage the great issues of the day
like shafting civil service and equity pay,
and keeping the separatists from the front bench
(or sovereignists as I call them in French),
to deal with the threatening socialist hordes
and keep for myself all patronage rewards.

Make no mistake (and I have made none)
it's time to invest -you'll make a ton!
Some may be worried about affairs of state
Me, I'm happy to just sit and wait!

Though it's time to build trust, and to take the
high road,
I considered my chances, and chose to prorogue!

It is, it is a glorious thing,
to be a laissez faire Prime Minister King!

Larry Kazdan

My Second Favourite Ani DiFranco Song

"Napoleon" is my second favourite Ani DiFranco song, right after "Gratitude".

She played it last Friday, and it was amazing!

I heard that the person she's talking about in the song is Madonna. The story I heard is that she wrote it in response to Madonna's request that she move from her independent label, Righteous Babe Records, to her label (at the time) Maverick Records...inneresting...

Song: Napoleon
Record: Dialate, Living In Clip, So Much Shouting So Much Laughter

they told you your music
could reach millions
that the choice was up to you
you told me they always
pay for lunch
and they believe in what i do
and i wonder
if you miss your old friends
once you've proven what you're worth
yeah i wonder
when you're a big star
will you miss the earth

and i know you would always want more
i know you would never be done
'cuz everyone is a fucking napoleon
yeah everyone is a fucking napoleon

and the next time
that i saw you
you were larger than life
you came and you conquered
you were doing alright
you had an army
of suits behind you
and all you had to be was willing
and i said i still
make a pretty good living
you must make a killing
a killing

and i hope that you are happy
i hope at least you are having fun
'cuz but everyone is a fucking napoleon
yeah everyone is a fucking napoleon

now you think, so that is
the way it's gonna be
that's what this is all about
i think that that is
the way it always was
you chose not to notice until now
yeah now that there's a problem
you call me up to confide
and you go on for over an hour
'bout each one that took you for a ride

and i guess that you dialed my number
'cuz you thought for sure that i'd agree
i said baby, you know i still love you
but how dare you complain to me

everyone is a fucking napoleon
yeah everyone is a fucking napoleon

Ani's Song for Obama

A song for Obama...kind of cheese-tastic, but still cool.

Sigh. Stephen Needs Some Help.

Cheers for Mentruation! Ani Rocks...

I saw Ani DiFranco last Friday in Hamilton. And I can say it was AMAZING!

I rekindle my love of her music, and if you don't know it already, shame on you- you're a bad feminist!

Enjoy her shout out to menstruation, and I'll be posting more videos of the concert...including the ones where you can hear the incredibly drunk girl who was sitting next to me all night and touched me inappropriately at many points of the evening...

A Survey Done By My Youngest Sister...

Sometimes I think my sister is the most hilarious person. Ever. Check out her answers to a Christmas survey...

Christmas Fun

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper!!

2. Real tree or Artificial? Absolutely REAL. I pity those children who have to grow up on decorating fake, perfect looking, no smelling trees *cough*Rachel*cough*

3. When do you put up the tree? I'm pretty sure in the next week and a half or so :0)

4. When do you take the tree down? If I had my way, never

5. Do you like eggnog? Have never had it, on account of the fact that if I did, my tongue would swell to the approximate size of my head. So I think I'll avoid that experience.

6. Favorite gift received as a child? I remember I got my first discman, it was like, metallic purple and I played my Destiny's Child cd in it. I was the shit.

7. Hardest person to buy for? I would say Mom or Dad. Though as long as you make Mom happy, Dad is too, so it's really just Mom

8. Easiest person to buy for? Either of my sisters

9. Do you have a nativity scene? Yep, I made on in like, grade 3 or 4 and they had these wooden figures that we coloured with makers. Yep it looks as nice as you would imagine.

10. Mail or email Christmas cards? Maybe email?There are actually some really cute ones you can find online

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? That's hard, I feel grateful for any gift I recieve as I know there are some people in the world who don't even get anything.......probably some jewellery from Claire's that I got in highschool

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? Elf, or Christmas Vacation, or The Grinch with Jim Carey, and I also love all the old specials that they show on tv.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? I actually started early this year, like, middle of November

14. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Any kind of cookie, and turkey, mmhhhmmm

15. Lights on the tree? Yes! But NOT those dumbass LED lights that don't even light up, they're just already coloured. I love the tiny ones that are really bright and it looks all glowy. (see what happens when you mess with my routine mom and dad? Bring back the OLD LIGHTS!)

16. Favorite Christmas song? All I want for Christmas is you, Have a Holly Jolly Christmas by Burl Ives, and any one sung by Harry Connick Jr., Josh Groban, Frank Sinatra, and Bing Crosby

17. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Home Home Homeee!!

18. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph (not gonna lie, I just sang the song to myself like, 3 times to make sure I got it right ahaha)

19. Angel on the tree top or a star? Silver glitter star!!

20. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?Christmas Morning, after breakfast and stockings and all that jazz

21. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? The ruthless shoppers who get in my way while I'm trying to do my job. F@#$ off.

22. Favorite ornament theme or color? Mmm, I love all the ones we got at Disney World

23. Favorite for Christmas dinner? Turkey...mashed potatoes, gravy....mmmmm

24. What do you want for Christmas this year? Edward Cullen

Prop 8: The Musical

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

Coalitions Are Not Coups

I need to clarify something.

This upcoming (fingers crossed) coalition government is not a coup.

It's not illegal. It's not immoral. It's not stupid.

And it's not a minority taking over.

62% of Canadians did not vote for Stephen Harper's Conservatives. He only received 38% of the vote.

Doesn't that seem shady to anyone? That someone can receive less than 40% of the vote, yet still be Prime Minister.

So when the Liberals, NDP and Bloc get together and make a plan, that's not a coup. That's the majority getting together and actually doing some work...strange concept for the House of Commons, I know.

So, when someone says that this is a coup give them a shake. Coups are horrible events. People die, torture happens, countries collapse. This is a matter of the majority of Canadian voters FINALLY getting their voices heard in Ottawa.

Strange, but true.

Yet Another Reason London City Council Is The Equivalent of a Grade 3 Classroom

'A head of lettuce, a pumpkin or that chicken that you ate last night, it collapses unto itself, it decays, it doesn't take up that much space at the landfill.'



~ Ward 10 Councillor Paul Van Meerbergen explaining his reasons for opposing the Green Bin program on Steve (Dr. Love) Garrison's London-in-the-Morning Show on Newstalk 1290-CJBK-AM, Nov. 17, 2008.

Perezzies...What You Vote for When There's A Foot of Snow Outside

Hottest Hookup	Biggest Breakup
Scarlett Johannson a...	Madonna and Guy Ritc...
Favorite Jonas	Breakout Star of the Year
Nick	Lady Gaga
Baddest Bad Girl	Biggest Scandal
Miley Cyrus	Amy Winehouse's Life...
Best Dressed	Worst Dressed
Anne Hathaway	Mischa Barton
Hottest Hottie	Cutest Celebuspawn
Robert Pattinson	Violet Affleck
Most Improved	Worst Trainwreck
Perez Hilton	Lily Allen
Most DVR-worthy Series	Biggest Box Office Blowout
The Office	The Dark Knight
Celeb of the Year
Barack Obama

Who would you vote for?
Go to PerezHilton.com to vote!

Ew!

Today's a bad day- but this video made me smile, then caught me by surprise.

Enjoy.

Question for CNN

When did Will.i.am. become a political commentator?

All of a sudden I'm seeing my favourite Black Eyed Pea talking about China, Obama, and all things political.

Apart from the 2003 hit "Where Is The Love?", I'm pretty sure he doesn't have actual credentials.

But perhaps Will.i.am is now the hip-hop equivalent of Bono.

I guess it could be worse, but I will remind people of my reluctance to embrace celebrity endorsement of anything that is not fashion, perfume or actual art.

I Blame the Parents

As I sit in my parents' house while they are away in Washington, DC I find my attention shifting to their immense cable TV package.

I don't have the ever trite channel "TLC" (which doesn't stand for "Tender Lovin' Care", although I think it should) but for me it's like crack. I love it. I can't stop from flicking over to it every few hours and see what's on.

I find that most of their shows are based on crushing souls. Sometimes it's crushing people's spirits by telling them that they look like shit (What Not To Wear, Ten Years Younger, Big Medicine, Makeover Train, Must Love Kids), or by making you feel bad that you don't cook organically for your family and you only have TWO kids (Jon and Kate Plus Eight), or by crushing the dreams of first time home owners (Property Ladder, Date My House, Flip That House). And of course, my new favourite crazy train, 17 Kids and Counting with the ever-Quiverfull Duggar family.

Since my new obsession is the Duggar family in all of their conservative Baptist craziness, imagine my surprise (and bizarre delight) when back to back episodes aired this evening.

Where do I begin?

There are so many things that make me shake my head at this family.

Let's start with this evening's episode. This evening's show had the Duggars hosting the Bates family from Tennessee, another Quiverfull family, they have 16 kids.

Side note: the Bates found out that number 17 is on it's way via a stop at a gas station.

Apparently this is the Duggars attempt to normalize their huge family (See America! We're not out of our minds! There's another family that's just like us!). Seriously, the families are so alike I can't even tell the moms apart.

Eventually the convo turned to the ever quaint term of "courtship". No dating for the Duggars or the Bates. If you get chosen (or betroved or matched or forced) to be courted, there's no way out. You are getting married. Oh, and the courtship? No contact. Except hand holding. That's it. And to ensure this, every time you go out we're sending one of your siblings to chaparone you. WTF? Chaperone? Bascially the message is, we've sheltered you all your life, kept you away from TV, the Internet and well, we think if you two are alone, well, you'll succumb to your horny temptations. My question would be, since they've been so sheltered, would they even know what to do?

Anyway, during this episode it was a touch obvious that a Duggar/Bates matchmaking effort would not be distasteful for either side.

And I did find out about the clothing situation. Apparently the long skirt/high neck lines are pleasing to God. But I think it's interesting to see that the girls' clothing are obviously hand made, while the boys wear something akin to J. Crew. So, bascially we're enjoying re-enforcing those gender stereotypes in a variety of different ways.

Side note: when the Duggars/Bates went to a Christian theme park the Bates kids were wearing the same outfits as the "pilgrims". You couldn't tell them apart.

And finally (for now) what I find MOST ridiculous about both families is their espousing that there is no TV, no music (even contemporary Christian music is a no-no), no Internet, and no friends who don't share same values.

But do you know what both families do think is an appropriate family activity?

PAINT BALL.

Yes, dressing up in layers (because when the kids are done they are covered in painful bruises), picking up a gun filled with paint pellets and using kids as young as 4 as target practice.

Yeah, nice wholesome family fun.

Am I the only one to see the ridiculous-ness of this? I don't know what to say.

And as the Facebook group I just joined says, "It's A Vagina, Not A Clown Car".

The View

We're Gonna Miss Ya, Kinda

Things we'll miss about you, Gov. Palin...

Folksy mannerisms
Your pronunciations (lack of) your Rs
Your "experience"
Your unnerving mis-education about the Bush Doctrine
Your laws that require rape victims to purchase their own rape kits
Your fucking insane stance on the abortion issue
Your weird winking
Your spending
Tina Fey
Your aversion to pronouncing the letter "g" at the end of words
How you have forever changed what a "Maverick" is
Your destruction of McCain's reputation
Your wardrobe
Your ethics, or lack there of
You mentioning "Main Street" every g-d second
The way you combine people's first name, "the" and their profession (classic!)
The way you bash community organizers (F U)
Your subtle evocations of the ever thoughtful chant of "Drill Baby, Drill"
Pageant jokes
Trying to pass off a part time job as mayor to a town of 9,000 as true experience
Teen pregnancies
Your sentences to Nowhere
Helicopter hunting for the continental US
You're roguish ways
Any interviews you have ever done
Seeing you meet the real Nicholas Sarkozy for the first time
Forced teen marriage
You trying to make the beluga extinct
You checking on Russia every morning from your kitchen window

But most of all I will miss...um...hang on...um...oh yeah.

Abso-fucking-lutely nothing.

Don't let the door hit you on your ass on the way back to Alaska!

"Change Has Come To America"

I'm not even an American, but watching his speech was something else.

Now let's put up or shut up, Dems.

"The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but America -- I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you -- we as a people will get there."

~ President-Elect, Barack Obama

This Is How I Want To Go...

Alright, so there's this guy in Grand Rapids, MI who bowled a perfect (perfect 300!) game of bowling not to long ago.

And right after the high fives, he dies of a massive heart attack right there in the bowling alley.

What?!

Maybe that's how I'd want to go...at least I can reassure myself that it would be a long time from now since at the moment my all time bowling record is a 47.

Check out the story:

Bowler collapses and dies after rolling 300 game

RAVENNA, Mich. (WZZM) - Teammates in his bowling league think after rolling a perfect 300 game Don Doane's heart just gave out.

"You get nervous shooting a 300," says teammate Todd Place. "The pressure keeps building," says bowling alley owner Jim Nutt.

Minutes after achieving the life long goal of a perfect game the 62 year old bowler collapsed and died at Ravenna Bowl in Ravenna. "Don just collapsed," says alley owner Nutt. " At first we thought he just fainted." "Then when I rolled him over I realized it wasn't good," says teammate Place.

The teammates say he was giving a high-five minutes before. They tried to revive him but Doane never spoke another word. He died of what was apparently a massive heart attack "He looked fine, reached across the table and gave me a high-five and he fell over," says Place.

"I think he died by the time he hit the floor." Don Doane was a member of the "Nutt Farm" bowling team at Ravenna Bowl for 45 years. His teammates says its strange not to see him on league nights.

"It was like a book, a final chapter," says Place. "He threw his 300 game with all of his friends, gave each other high-fives and it's like the story ended. He died with a smile on his face."

"Don will be a legend," says Nutt. 'It's something that will never be forgotten as long as people bowl here." Ravenna Bowl is planning a memorial ceremony for Doan's' wife Linda and son Chad.

Phil Dawson, WZZM 13 West Michigan

Banners That Make Me Smile

This made me laugh the same way The Bachelor reality TV show does...with a little sadness because people actually believe in this crap.

The day that teaching abstinence only is more effective than giving teenagers real and practical information about safer sex is the day that I will gladly eat one of my shoes.

New Blog To Read!

Alrighty, this campaign down South is sometimes annoying and "vicious circle" often comes to mind when I think about it, but-

I just found a really cool blog.

It's called "Margaret and Helen". They are two 82 year young women who are Obama supporters and have learned how to blog from one of their grandsons!

How awesome is that?

Their blog topics range from the overused "Bush-shit" to the clever "Maverick My Ass" to the very hilarious "The Straight Talk Express Just Drove Off the Bridge to Nowhere".

Enjoy this blog, it was sent to me from a friend- very cool :-)

And their photo of them in their scooters proves that age knows no limit- so Mary, get ready to blog!

http://margaretandhelen.wordpress.com

Tina vs. Sarah

When Annie Cried...

Secretly she wanted to be the one on stage.

All American Crappy Video

Performing "All American Girl" while her video plays in the back.

Her music video for this song is CLASSIC COUNTRY CHEEZ!

First Song...

This gem is called "Flat On The Floor".

Classy, Carrie. Classy.

Before He Cheats...

She went off stage for 20 seconds, then came back to sing "Before He Cheats".

This was supposed to be the encore...no one chanted "Carrie"...argh.

Show Stopper....

I have a feeling I know what she's thinking...

"Bad" Hair Day

She told everyone she was wearing the butterfly headband because she was having a bad hair day....

Yeah, um, on behalf of all the people who don't employ people whose sole purpose is tending to your capillaceous, SCREW YOU. You were NOT having a bad hair day.

Just sing using your sparkly microphone, bitch.

She Can Play Electric Guitar...For REALS

Rockin' out, yet again...Seriously!

No, She's Not Grabbing Herself...

Carrie Underwood decided to try a cover of a Guns and Roses song...she should stick with Gordie Sampson covers...

I Was Right, Hilary Duff Kicks Ass

I knew there was a reason I loved Hilary Duff.

And now I have a reason I can tell other people.

Laughing Quadruplets For Maggie

BSC BLOG!

I can't find my camera cord to upload Carrie Underwood pictures and video, so it's going to be a bit longer.

In the meantime, I've found a Babysitter's Club BLOG!

For those of you who don't know what the BSC is, screw you!

It's just the best effing series of my YOUTH! It was a domesticating time of my life- I used to sneak reading these in my bedroom in Sarnia while my mother thought I was reading "classics".

Kristy (the bossy one), Claudia (the idiot), Stacey (the cool NYCer), Mary-Ann (the quiet, shy one), Dawn (the vegetarian hippy), Mallory (who I resented 'cause she had red hair and SUCKED), and Jessi (the dancer who spelled my name wrong) were my great escape.

When a major motion picture came out, I just about lost it.

Anywho- enjoy this blog! I have since parted with all my copies of BSC (they mysteriously disappeared en route from Sarnia to London in 1995), but can relive them with this blog's hilarious recappings.

http://claudiasroom.blogspot.com/

Jesus Took My Wheel

Annie and I went to the JLC last night to see the singer and A.I. champ, Carrie Underwood.

It was definitely interesting, I'll have more to say about the narcissistic video, costume changes, headband, guitar 'playing', confetti, audience members and my little sis later.

Right now I have to give a test.

Check out the favorable review she got in the LFP below...


Journey worth the ride Tue, October 7, 2008

CONCERT: Carrie Underwood takes about 9,000 fans at the JLC along on her whirlwind ride to success

By JAMES REANEY

Carrie Underwood was in full voice introducing some of her new material from Carnival Ride to an appreciative crowd at the JLC last night. (DEREK RUTTAN, Sun Media)
Carrie's country carnival ride had thousands along for the hits and the glitz at the John Labatt Centre last night.



With about 9,000 fans jamming the London arena, U.S. country superstar Carrie Underwood hit the stage with Flat on the Floor from her hit album Carnival Ride.



The fans thundered out the final seconds of a big-screen countdown before a virtual Underwood was seen in faux leather in a video of a desert scene. It was the first of many looks -- ranging from Wonder Woman on the prowl at a honky-tonk bar to leather-jacketed rocker -- for Underwood on the night.



Of course, Underwood and her fans need those costumes. Not too many American Idol champs headline tours where they prove they can cover Randy Travis (a lovely I Told You So, in an unplugged-style mini-set) and Guns 'n' Roses (a noisy, butt-kicking Paradise City in the encore). Underwood is the only one.



The 2005 American Idol champ departed from the stage by a lift, just as she had arrived. Underwood left waving goodbye after the night's finale Before He Cheats had attracted a fierce and happy singalong from the thousands of sisters of all ages she had in the house.

About 90 minutes earlier, Underwood had arrived to huge cheers and flashes from countless cameras and cellphones. She was soon taking songs from Carnival Ride (Sony/BMG) out to the big walkway into the centre of the crowd, strutting with style,"I was so scared. Nobody was going to come," Underwood said at one point, talking about her fears as she prepared for the tour being her first as a headliner.



It was one of many times when she talked in an unaffected and seemingly unscripted way. She kidded her first outfit of the night -- which combined silver boots, an odd combination of Madonna in a vest at the top and a loose, multi-coloured skirt -- as superhero garb giving her the impression she just might fly when she was on stage. That outfit didn't fly, but Underwood soared in many other ways.



The glittery butterfly image on her headband was cuter. It saved what was not a good hair day and also gave her the superhero vibe, she joked.



Early in the set, Underwood turned around the lyrics to All-American Girl to "all-Canadian. On-stage help came from a five-year-old princess identified as Holly Siviero with Underwood kneeling to share the microphone.



The Grammy winner with the biggest-selling American Idol champ's album, Some Hearts, showed modesty and wit in keeping her career video montage short enough so that the screen went blank just as Idol host Ryan Seacrest was about to name her as the winner. Underwood and her tour handlers also showed they know how to move uptown as she emerged from a big, blue, ultra-sincere gown during Checotah, a song paying tribute to her Oklahoma hometown. "It doesn't matter," she said of the mispronunciations visited on Checotah. For the record, it sort of rhymes with "Dakota" and sounds gorgeous when Underwood sings about it. Gorgeous, too, was the skirt she wore underneath the gown. That look emerged as Underwood went uptown in the song's video. Production values and glitz -- lighting, videos, screens, a confetti shower finale -- were strong.



She saluted Cape Breton songwriter Gordie Sampson for his role in helping write Jesus, Take the Wheel and Just a Dream. Both are songs Underwood said she'll sing "for the rest of my life."
Along with The More Boys I Meet, So Small, Some Hearts, Last Name, Get Out of This Town and other Underwood hits, they received terrific treatment from the star and her eight-member band. U.S. group Little Big Town opened strongly for Underwood.

I Hate People Like This

This website just aired a commercial that ticked me off.


"Signal Hill is an advocate for human rights that provides information on life issues, women's health, and family support. Signal Hill's position is grounded in the conviction that the life of human beings ought to be understood as a fundamental human right and protected from conception until natural end."

Seriously, we're not all dumb enough to believe the "abortion gave me cancer" lies.

And the pictures of babies on their website is quite compelling. Whoever believes that pregnant and distressed women who see pictures of newborns will change their mind is delusional.

My fave part of this is that in their "Bio Ethics" heading it reads "Coming Soon". How true...

Courtesy of My Dad

Don't forget the debate is on tonight!



Post Turtle --

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75-year old Texas rancher, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to Sarah Palin and her bid to be a heartbeat away from being President.

The old rancher said, ' Well, ya know, Palin is a post turtle.'

Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a post turtle was.

The old rancher said, ' When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle.'

The old rancher saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain.

"You know, she didn't get up there by herself, she doesn't belong up there, she doesn't know what to do while she is up there, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put her up there to begin with."

Courtesy of Annie

We all know how much she loves her Disney flicks, here's another one...although I'm not sure if this is family friendly. More like terrifying, and vomit-inducing.

Stewart On Palin

I have been trying to find a place where I could see this clip that everyone's been talking about for the past two weeks.

And it's brilliant. Truly, it shows what a douchebag Karl Rove and his cronies are.

Sexism is alive and well...lets see how the rest of their circus goes...

Please Don't Pass The Nuts Blog

Ch-ch-check out the new fave blog, "Please Don't Pass The Nuts".

Whiskey sours aren't exactly the most nutritious, but better than Annie's long list of allergens.

Reba McEntire : The Original Video Goddess

Mom, Annie and I were in the car yesterday when I recalled a video done by Reba McEntire. It was probably the most memorable video she ever made for me, and that's considering how fantastically cheesy they usually are.

I promised Annie I would search for the video and post it in all it's cheese glory.

Unfortunately the people who posted this gem have disabled the embedding option, so instead I give you a link to see Reba McEntire's "Is There Life Out There".

I wonder why I love this video so much. I have no clue.

All I know is that the concept is vaguely familiar (i.e. mom goes back to university), but that's where the similarities end.

I've always had a soft spot for music videos with dialogue in them, and we have Ms. Pat Benetar to thank for that, I believe.

Couple all this with Reba's fabulously frizzy red hair and it's a gem. Really all her videos are amazing, I'm sure I'll be posting those soon.

So, pleasepleaseplease check out the link- it will not disappoint. We need more music videos with story/dialogue/message/crotchety old man/etc.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7Bd3y_Ip4Q

p.s. Check out the above tiny pictures. The depict the scenes where Reba screams at her video daughter for spilling coffee on her essay, prompting Reba to state after getting the paper back "I think I learned more from the stain." *sniff*sniff*

Quiverfull Makes Me Quiver, And Not In A Good Way

Alright, have we heard about this movement? This was just brought to my attention today and I have to say I'm oddly fascinated and terrified at the same time.

Quiverfull essentially means that when two people (man and woman) are married then no birth control (Pill, condom, rhythm method, NOTHING) may be used. Have as many children as you have, each is a blessing, each is from God, etc., etc.

And it seems that this is catching on, in some areas of the world. Most notably in the US and now in Canada.

Hey, if you want to have tons of babies, by all means, go and procreate. It's really no skin off my nose.

However, please don't tell me that if you have 12 children you'll be able to spend as much quality time together. Or that you'll all be happy all the time. Let's be real. When you have a gaggle of babies (just as if you would only have one or none) nothing is perfect. I think this is the part that drives me the most insane. That everything is wonderful, everything is perfect, nothing is ever difficult and sleep is readily available.

For me, I find the most interesting conversation to be about this idea that more and more women are choosing (and in some cases I would use the word 'choose' loosely) this type of family planning.

The idea of a woman essentially being a vessel is a hard idea for me to accept, even if this is what they want. Call me a snob- but I am completely obsessed to know what the personal identity of those women are. Apart from the labels of 'mother' and 'wife', I wonder what they would classify themselves. I would love to pick apart their brain, although I imagine myself say "No, but really, what is your personal identity- without the kids. Because eventually the kids will leave and I want to know what you do for yourself. So tell me."

Then I stumbled over an article that spoke about Andrea Yates. If you don't remember her I'll jog your memory. She was the mother who drowned all five of her young children in the bathtub when her husband was at work. After she was arrested and found that post-partum depression played a large role even more evidence rolled in. According to reports, a couple of days previous to the horrifying deaths of the five Yates children, Andrea started to get pamphlets and visits from her Quiverfull-devoted church. And these visits were not the "how's it going" variety. It seems that people had heard about Andrea's desire to stop having babies and unhappiness with her role as mama.

Hm. Hopefully the lack of support was kept in mind when she was punished (which was deserved).

And then there's the fascination that media has, and in turn a large population of us. Television shows and specials are being massed produced (Duggars anyone?). And the ratings are fantastic. Which is good for them, feeding a brood of 13 children gets expensive. However I had seen some families be very resourceful with saving money (Tater Tots, making clothes, diapers and using all that free manual labour).

I may sound self-righteous about this, but I think my concerns are valid. Couple this with the fact that roles in the families are straight out of Leave It To Beaver (girls are in charge of cooking and sewing, boys in charge of outside maintenance), we should all be talking about this change in family makeup.

But again, I will stress that my mantra "My uterus, my decision, so keep your theology off my biology" swings both ways. So while I have warranted concerns, if the Duggars want to usher in baby number 20 after number 19 is born in January- by all means go for it. *Jessie shudders for Mrs. Duggar's vagina*

I Don't Even Like His Flicks

I'm not a huge Matt Damon fan (although I do believe that I wore out a copy of "Good Will Hunting" on VHS when I was in high school), but I have to say that since this video has been making the rounds, I'm changing my mind about him.

Apparently, Matt Damon is the most bankable star, meaning that his return at the box office when compared to what he makes is the best.

Now I can see why. You may have already seen this short clip of Matty talking about his concern about Sarah Palin, but you should watch again.

I'm not too hot on celebs who spout off about politics, but I am really feeling this one (coincidentally we kind of agree).

His dreamy.

Spelling Bee Fainter

Still My Fave Fairy Tale (Rachel Would Really Like It!)

My dad sent this story to me a while ago and I believe he was being a bit of a shit disturber when he did. But it's so lovely.

As well, I think that my little friend, Rachel, would actually love this story. I say this because the tiny senior kindergarten-er has a bizarre fascination with killing off the characters in her stories that she tells to anyone who will listen.

Note to her parents, tell her this story tonight (and makes sure she's wearing her favourite green t-shirt).

The fairy tale they should have read us when we were little girls...

Once upon a time in a land far away a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle.

The frog hopped into the princess' lap and said "Elegant lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper young prince that I am.

And then my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother. Where you can prepare meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so."

That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on lightly sauteed frog legs seasoned in white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled and thought to herself...

I don't fucking think so.

Changes At VT

You may have noticed that I'm trying some stuff out here with the blog now that we've passed the two year period (and I have some time on my hands).

New templates and widgets may be popping up- and I would like to draw your attention towards the "Blog List" which is one of my favourites at the moment.

They're my favourite blogs out there (so far with many more to come) and they update as their authors do. I'm really loving "Feministing" right now. Its stuff on feminism and Sarah Palin are amazing and quite necessary as people seem to want to paste this label onto the govenor of Alaska. Quite frightening when you think about it- definitely check it out! It's mildly terrifying what people (and when I say people I mean 'men') are trying to create Palin to be. The video about Palin's inactivity surrounding Alaska's sky rocketing domestic violence rates (the clip talks about it being a real epidemic in the northern state) is pretty shocking. Her actions don't really read as 'feminist' even to the most loose definition.

Anyway- check it out along with the others (Five Blondes is a very good read as well!) and send me your faves.

Oh, and participate democratically on my blog! Ch-ch-check out the polls and get ready for Oct. 14th and stretch your voting muscles.

A Unique Experience?

Yes, last Sunday I entered my very first spa.

Not exactly something I saw myself doing- but kind of interesting.

Annie, Maggie, Gramma and I drove over the spa on Windermere.

It was very different stepping right in, and we started with colour selection for our PEDICURE. For me the selection was very easy. My favourite colour, the colour of my car and the colour of my political party was the first one I picked: orange.

For my family, it seemed more like a crisis. Choosing colours is not an easy thing for my sisters (or my gramma!) to do quickly. It was odd considering that most of the colours were just different shades of pink and red.

Before we knew it our spa people (what do you call someone who gives you a pedicure?) came up behind us. Each of them called out our name, and it was mildly reminisct of my childhood playground.

We were brought into the back and there were four seats that were very cushion-y. Strange...they were on a platform and this presented my first issue. How the hell do I get up there? First I had to take of my nasty flip flops...and I guess you'll first have to know about my philosophy about flip flops. I buy one pair a year (for about $20...the Airwalks are my favourite). And by the end of the summer (around this time) they are very odd looking and a bit rank. And considering that the ones I wore on this Sunday were the same ones I tromped around Australia with they are a bit weird looking. They have traveled over 30,000 kilometers, and they look it.

Anywho- I took those off (and praying that Yoanne didn't pick them up) and then had to figure out how to get up on the stair and in the comfy chair. After a little help, I got up there.

When we were all up, I had to test the water...and I did it with my hand. Big mistake. I guess you have to do this with your foot. Whatever. At least I didn't think the water was laced with Mr. Clean, as Annie thought.

So the pedicure started...and I'm realizing that someone is touching my FEET. It was bizarre.

And I had a lot of questions. Because as she started she opened up a sterile package of big metal tools. And those big metal tools were going straight for my size eleven wides...

My questions were along the lines of:

What is that?
What are you doing?
What's that for?
What am I smelling?

And my family was not kind.

Besides that, I had no idea what to do in the long silences. I would look over, and all three of them would be quiet or have eyes closed. How do you sleep when someone is messing with your feet? Anxiety begins for Jessie...

Meanwhile, my fear of kicking the poor woman because of my ticklish feet did not happen. Thank god. But when I did look over at Annie, she did have the jimmy legs...moving all over. Luckily, Marta (her pedicure-person) had a firm grip on her oddly shaped mini-feet (seriously, her toes are waaay stumpy).

About mid way through, Yoanne took a bag and put it on my foot. It was hot. I asked about 3 questions rapid fire. Turns out this was the wax I had heard about. Earlier that day Maggie and Annie had mentioned something about melted wax. And I was a touch concerned.

Me: They do what?!

I would love to know who thought of this little treatment with hot wax. How does that get discovered? Was it an accident? Who was the guinea pig for that? Someone still needs to explain the logic.

Well, this is what they do- they slip your foot into a bag filled with melted wax. An odd sensation really.

But when all was said and done, my feet were the cleanest they have been since grade 3.

And I think I actually might have liked it-just a little.

If anything, my toes are ready to vote NDP (that is if we get a candidate in this riding...).

Pretty Song

You must listen to this song, "Today" by Joshua Radin. So nice.

In Reference To The Last Post...

The answer is an emphatic no.

Jessie Orange-less In London North Centre

Ok, so I'm not feeling very well and wanted to cheer myself up...and naturally I would find out about our impending federal election (yea!).

Imagine my surprise when I found out that I have NO candidate for NDP in my riding.

What the hell?!

This is ridiculous. I am livid. What is going on? Are you kidding me? Seriously? No NDP candidate in London North Centre? Out of about 120,000 people we have absolutely zero possibilities?

I can't even process this. What the heck am I supposed to do on October 14th? What? What?! Someone please tell me. And don't even suggest going blue or red.

I went through a bizarre pedicure to get my neglected toes coloured like an NDP (more on that later...and there is much more) and I have no candidate.

I could spoil my ballot...

So here I am hopped up on Benedryl and sneezing my head off and trying to understand why we have no one.

This is bullshit.

Getting Barack'd Rolled

Maybe This Will Work For Maggie's Class?

Teacher rewards pupils with signed photos

A handsome teacher in China is offering pupils autographed photos of himself to encourage them to work harder.

Ji Feng, also vice principal of Zhiyuan Foreign Language Elementary School, is so popular among students that a lot of them were asking him for pictures.

"I came up with the idea of giving them my signed pictures as a reward," he told the Nanjing Morning Post.

Students who put in exemplary work can now pose for a picture with Ji who then signs the printed photograph.

Ji added: "It absolutely is not narcissism, but a way of encouragement. And only the students who perform the best can get such a reward."

Ji said three students had so far submitted work good enough for signed pictures - but he hoped to give out many more.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Eat it, Cyrus.

It's Late, I'm exhausted and This Is Hilarious!

With all the who-ha about the upcoming US presidential election, this photo made me laugh.

I'm slightly befuddled at how the pregnant teen is dealing with her mom's bid for the VP position...the whole situation is definitely bizarre.

I wonder what the conversation was in the Palin family was last week before the announcement was made...

"Well family, I'm being named as John McCain's running mate."

"But Mom, I'm pregnant and 17 years old! Won't that be a problem? Won't people make horrible assumptions, jokes and parodied movie posters about me?"

"Oh, sure they will. But I've only been Governor of Alaska for 20 months and I'm currently under investigation for my ethics...when I am I going to get this opportunity again? Never. When will you get pregnant again? The chances are actually really good! To the campaign bus!"

My Musings...

It's been a while, but I've had a lot of time to think.

I'm having a hard time finding a venue to disperse all of my recently acquired knowledge that I have gathered through teaching, driving, genocide education and the like.

So in no order of importance, these are the things that I have learned over the past couple of weeks:

1. If you hold a sign at Toronto's Lester B. Pearson International Airport that says "Genocide Summer Institute" you get one of the following:
a) strange looks
b) strangers coming up and talking to you
c) people asking, "You aren't promoting it are you?" and me saying, "Ha ha! (under my breath) That's original, you bastard."
d) deniers of the Armenian genocide challenging you
e) laughs (probably one of the most concerning...)

2. If there is a propane blast in Toronto that impedes traffic, you can bet your bottom dollar that Jessie will get caught in it.

3. If you're a radio DJ and you're telling listeners about a current event (you know, like a propane blast) get all the information first. And try not to say things like, "I don't know what's going on, but if you're in this area, get out now." Because when you do, Jessie's arrhythmia kicks in hard core.

4. Parking in the GTA is a bitch.

5. The beds at U of T are designed to ensure that you get the worst sleep possible, thus ensuring the perpetuation of snarly inhabitants of The Big Smoke.

6. David Emerson is a complete douche bag. Riddle me this asswipe: If the Olympics aren't political please explain to me what you, the Minister of FOREIGN AFFAIRS, attended the opening ceremonies??? Please explain that to me, because I'm at a loss why a POLITICIAN who is at a SPORTING EVENT and talks about CANADA-CHINA RELATIONS while he's there on official OLYMPIC business would say that.

7. Irwin Cotler is a Canadian hero, who also happens to have the softest hands of any person I've ever shaken hands with.

8. The book "Eat, Pray, Love" makes me want to vomit.

9. I have an unnatural addiction to Coldplay's newest album.

10. I think that even ugly kids are still cool, China.

Let's Get The Tiniest Kid We Know And Try This!

I can identify with the older sister. Standing by, freaking out because of the careless and wiry little sister.

Seriously dangerous...seriously hilarious.

Uh, WTF?

Ok, so I was curious about this move that Stephen Colbert made when he started having musical guests on his show. I figured he was doing the same thing as Jon Stewart, where on the daily show they've had a total of 3 musical guest (give or take) in the past eight years...Tom Waits, The White Stripes and Coldplay...not a bad line up.

Colbert started off with Canadian GODS, Rush. Awesome interview, excellent song (Tom SAWYER), Neil Peart drum solo (drool), and the next episode of The Report had Stephen waking up at the studio with Rush still playing (Ha ha! They have really, really long songs!).

Last night Crosby, Stills and Nash sang one of their protest songs (with Colbert dressed as the missing Neil Young, singing along).

But both of these performances book ended someone who just scared the shit out of me. And my fears were compounded when I readed The Huffington Post late yesterday.

Toby eff-ing Keith.

If you're not familiar with Keith, he a good ole boy country star. Likes his steaks thick, women submissive, and apparently his songs tinged with racism.

I thought that Colbert was going to rip him to shreds. But no. A bit of boot lickin' and a song was sung...I turned the channel.

And here's the song...highlighted with the SCARY part.

Well a man come on the 6 o'clock news
said somebody's been shot
somebody's been abused
somebody blew up a building
somebody stole a car
somebody got away
somebody didn't get to far yeah
they didn't get too far

Grandpappy told my pappy back in my day, son
A man had to answer for the wicked that he'd done
Take all the rope in Texas
Find a tall oak tree, round up all of them bad boys
Hang them high in the street
For all the people to see

That Justice is the one thing you should always find
You got to saddle up your boys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles we'll sing a victory tune
And we'll all meet back at the local saloon
And we'll raise up our glasses against evil forces singing
whiskey for my men, beer for my horses

We got too many gangsters doing dirty deeds
too much corruption and crime in the streets
It's time the long arm of the law put a few more in the ground
Send 'em all to their maker and he'll settle 'em down
You can bet he'll set 'em down...

(courtesy of The Huffington Post)

GAH!

WTF?

Greening the Driveway

I was send this link via the London Activist Network...

It's pretty cool!


http://www.frankejames.com/debate/?p=98

The Boycott Continues...

And the boycott continues...from my most reliable news source, PerezHilton.com:

-------

It's news like this that makes us happy we live in a FREE country.

According to new reports, China will censor the Internet used by the foreign media during the Olympics in Beijing.

This completely reverses the pledge the government had made to offer complete media freedom during the games.

Sun Weide, a spokesman for the organizing committee, said "During the Olympic Games we will provide sufficient access to the Internet for reporters."

He also added that journalists would not be able to access websites or any information connected to the Falungong spiritual movement, which is banned in China.

Weide added that some other sites would also be unavailable to journalists, but did not specify which ones.

Oh, and did we mention that the Chinese people have to deal with this every day? The same thing in Cuba.

Their government blocks out certain sites and restricts access to their people.

Craziness!

Time WASTERS!

I find this to be immensely satisfying.

If I worked in a post office I would be horribly unproductive...the bubble wrap would distract me!

Check out this website and pop some virtual bubble wrap, make sure it's on MANIC mode for the most enjoyable popping.

http://www.virtual-bubblewrap.com/popnow.shtml

W00T!

Get Ready For The Boycott!

She Will SLAM DUNK You!

Check out this MASSIVE fight at last night's WNBA game, Detroit vs. L.A.

Will this make the Olympic bid for gold in Women's Basketball a bit tense?

Well, maybe now people will start watching the WNBA...

Check out a full clip at Perez Hilton...

http://perezhilton.com/2008-07-23-girls-gone-wildin-the-wnba

From The LondonCommons.net

I found this very interesting...

American Apparel's appeal to progressives?

Submitted by Mike McGregor on July 19, 2008 - 1:43pm.

tags:

Have you ever felt conflicted by the urge to support American Apparel's sweat-shop free practices and your reluctance to wear their gaudy clothes in public? I mean "Sweatshop-free" = good, and we always talk about voting with our dollars and supporting progressive companies right?

Well, don't worry about it. When you look a bit deeper, there's some pretty strong indications that American Apparel as a corporate entity isn't much more progressive then a rub-n-tug. By many accounts, AA's image is the fair labour and women's lib equivalent of a "Green Wash" (a "red wash" maybe?). Quite a few stories have popped up about allegations of American Apparel's union busting, degrading adds and the misogynist yuppie that runs it all... Google 'Dov Charney' and see what comes up. The guy is on his fifth sexual harassment lawsuit and his musing on domestic violence are interesting to say the least.

Don't take my word for it:

• http://clamormagazine.org/issues/38/aa/index.php
• http://www.inthesetimes.com/article/2270/

One Of The Most Humiliating Moments To Date

10:45am

July 17th, 2008

Wonderland Rd. and Springbank Rd.
London, Ontario

I'm going to Oakridge to pick up a couple of friends for a day in Grand Bend soaking up as little rays as possible while coated in Australian sunscreen.

As I'm driving I stop at a red light at Wonderland and Springbank.

A guy in a big black SUV taps on his window.

I roll down my window:

Guy: You've got something hanging out of your door.

Me: Oh? Thanks.

Guy drives off.

I open my door and am completely horrified.

I have been driving for the past 5 kilometers with my bra hanging out of my door.

And it's not just a little end of my bra. It's the whole damn thing.

Apparently in my haste to get to Grand Bend I inadvertently hooked my bra on the inside stitching of my bathing suit that I was wearing. And somehow didn't realize it until a random guy pointed it out.

Great. Just great.

As if being unemployed isn't destroying my self-esteem enough.

Perfect.

Perks of Unemployment

Reason #2:

Napping!

And not just that, waking up for a nap and thinking:

"Oh shit, I've slept through...ab-so-fucking-lutely nothing. More napping!"

I am building up my endurance to have the sleep schedule I did as a newborn.

Perks of Unemployment

Reason #1:

I can stay up late and watch The Daily Show and The Colbert Report.

Before I couldn't stay awake- now I don't have to worry since I'm not going anywhere.

It's good to laugh, rather than softly crying myself to sleep.

Ha! Ha! Ha!

Spelling Bee Moments...

I love this kid-

Just what a speller should be, having a good time.

Attack of the Frizz

I took this picture when I was underwater in the observatory in the Great Barrier Reef. It demonstrates my intense frizz that I had that day. What you can't see is how pale I am from barfing on the boat.

I post this today to show you what I have to live with right now.

I don't like being discriminated against because I have intensely frizzy hair that cannot be contained. Or rather can't be contained with any product that costs less than $3/milliliter.

Couple that with the fact that I'm out of a job as of tomorrow due to a lack of funding and I'm very, Very, VERY PISSED OFF AT THE DAMN HAIR PRODUCT INDUSTRY FOR MAKING ME FEEL LIKE SOME SORT OF BIZARRE ANOMALY WITH MY RED, CURLY, INCREDIBLY DRY, FRIZZY AND GRAYING (THANKS, DAD) WHACKED OUT HAIR. HAZEL, THE TRINIDADIAN HAIRDRESSER WON'T EVEN TAKE MY APPOINTMENTS ANYMORE, WHICH REALLY SHOULDN'T MATTER ANYWAY SINCE SHE GROSSLY OVER CHARGED ME ANYWAY FOR A CUT.

I think I may be projecting.

Anyway, I am taking donations of John Freida and Aveda.