Maybe This Will Work For Maggie's Class?

Teacher rewards pupils with signed photos

A handsome teacher in China is offering pupils autographed photos of himself to encourage them to work harder.

Ji Feng, also vice principal of Zhiyuan Foreign Language Elementary School, is so popular among students that a lot of them were asking him for pictures.

"I came up with the idea of giving them my signed pictures as a reward," he told the Nanjing Morning Post.

Students who put in exemplary work can now pose for a picture with Ji who then signs the printed photograph.

Ji added: "It absolutely is not narcissism, but a way of encouragement. And only the students who perform the best can get such a reward."

Ji said three students had so far submitted work good enough for signed pictures - but he hoped to give out many more.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Eat it, Cyrus.

It's Late, I'm exhausted and This Is Hilarious!

With all the who-ha about the upcoming US presidential election, this photo made me laugh.

I'm slightly befuddled at how the pregnant teen is dealing with her mom's bid for the VP position...the whole situation is definitely bizarre.

I wonder what the conversation was in the Palin family was last week before the announcement was made...

"Well family, I'm being named as John McCain's running mate."

"But Mom, I'm pregnant and 17 years old! Won't that be a problem? Won't people make horrible assumptions, jokes and parodied movie posters about me?"

"Oh, sure they will. But I've only been Governor of Alaska for 20 months and I'm currently under investigation for my ethics...when I am I going to get this opportunity again? Never. When will you get pregnant again? The chances are actually really good! To the campaign bus!"

My Musings...

It's been a while, but I've had a lot of time to think.

I'm having a hard time finding a venue to disperse all of my recently acquired knowledge that I have gathered through teaching, driving, genocide education and the like.

So in no order of importance, these are the things that I have learned over the past couple of weeks:

1. If you hold a sign at Toronto's Lester B. Pearson International Airport that says "Genocide Summer Institute" you get one of the following:
a) strange looks
b) strangers coming up and talking to you
c) people asking, "You aren't promoting it are you?" and me saying, "Ha ha! (under my breath) That's original, you bastard."
d) deniers of the Armenian genocide challenging you
e) laughs (probably one of the most concerning...)

2. If there is a propane blast in Toronto that impedes traffic, you can bet your bottom dollar that Jessie will get caught in it.

3. If you're a radio DJ and you're telling listeners about a current event (you know, like a propane blast) get all the information first. And try not to say things like, "I don't know what's going on, but if you're in this area, get out now." Because when you do, Jessie's arrhythmia kicks in hard core.

4. Parking in the GTA is a bitch.

5. The beds at U of T are designed to ensure that you get the worst sleep possible, thus ensuring the perpetuation of snarly inhabitants of The Big Smoke.

6. David Emerson is a complete douche bag. Riddle me this asswipe: If the Olympics aren't political please explain to me what you, the Minister of FOREIGN AFFAIRS, attended the opening ceremonies??? Please explain that to me, because I'm at a loss why a POLITICIAN who is at a SPORTING EVENT and talks about CANADA-CHINA RELATIONS while he's there on official OLYMPIC business would say that.

7. Irwin Cotler is a Canadian hero, who also happens to have the softest hands of any person I've ever shaken hands with.

8. The book "Eat, Pray, Love" makes me want to vomit.

9. I have an unnatural addiction to Coldplay's newest album.

10. I think that even ugly kids are still cool, China.

Let's Get The Tiniest Kid We Know And Try This!

I can identify with the older sister. Standing by, freaking out because of the careless and wiry little sister.

Seriously dangerous...seriously hilarious.

Uh, WTF?

Ok, so I was curious about this move that Stephen Colbert made when he started having musical guests on his show. I figured he was doing the same thing as Jon Stewart, where on the daily show they've had a total of 3 musical guest (give or take) in the past eight years...Tom Waits, The White Stripes and Coldplay...not a bad line up.

Colbert started off with Canadian GODS, Rush. Awesome interview, excellent song (Tom SAWYER), Neil Peart drum solo (drool), and the next episode of The Report had Stephen waking up at the studio with Rush still playing (Ha ha! They have really, really long songs!).

Last night Crosby, Stills and Nash sang one of their protest songs (with Colbert dressed as the missing Neil Young, singing along).

But both of these performances book ended someone who just scared the shit out of me. And my fears were compounded when I readed The Huffington Post late yesterday.

Toby eff-ing Keith.

If you're not familiar with Keith, he a good ole boy country star. Likes his steaks thick, women submissive, and apparently his songs tinged with racism.

I thought that Colbert was going to rip him to shreds. But no. A bit of boot lickin' and a song was sung...I turned the channel.

And here's the song...highlighted with the SCARY part.

Well a man come on the 6 o'clock news
said somebody's been shot
somebody's been abused
somebody blew up a building
somebody stole a car
somebody got away
somebody didn't get to far yeah
they didn't get too far

Grandpappy told my pappy back in my day, son
A man had to answer for the wicked that he'd done
Take all the rope in Texas
Find a tall oak tree, round up all of them bad boys
Hang them high in the street
For all the people to see

That Justice is the one thing you should always find
You got to saddle up your boys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles we'll sing a victory tune
And we'll all meet back at the local saloon
And we'll raise up our glasses against evil forces singing
whiskey for my men, beer for my horses

We got too many gangsters doing dirty deeds
too much corruption and crime in the streets
It's time the long arm of the law put a few more in the ground
Send 'em all to their maker and he'll settle 'em down
You can bet he'll set 'em down...

(courtesy of The Huffington Post)

GAH!

WTF?

Greening the Driveway

I was send this link via the London Activist Network...

It's pretty cool!


http://www.frankejames.com/debate/?p=98

The Boycott Continues...

And the boycott continues...from my most reliable news source, PerezHilton.com:

-------

It's news like this that makes us happy we live in a FREE country.

According to new reports, China will censor the Internet used by the foreign media during the Olympics in Beijing.

This completely reverses the pledge the government had made to offer complete media freedom during the games.

Sun Weide, a spokesman for the organizing committee, said "During the Olympic Games we will provide sufficient access to the Internet for reporters."

He also added that journalists would not be able to access websites or any information connected to the Falungong spiritual movement, which is banned in China.

Weide added that some other sites would also be unavailable to journalists, but did not specify which ones.

Oh, and did we mention that the Chinese people have to deal with this every day? The same thing in Cuba.

Their government blocks out certain sites and restricts access to their people.

Craziness!

Time WASTERS!

I find this to be immensely satisfying.

If I worked in a post office I would be horribly unproductive...the bubble wrap would distract me!

Check out this website and pop some virtual bubble wrap, make sure it's on MANIC mode for the most enjoyable popping.

http://www.virtual-bubblewrap.com/popnow.shtml

W00T!

Get Ready For The Boycott!

She Will SLAM DUNK You!

Check out this MASSIVE fight at last night's WNBA game, Detroit vs. L.A.

Will this make the Olympic bid for gold in Women's Basketball a bit tense?

Well, maybe now people will start watching the WNBA...

Check out a full clip at Perez Hilton...

http://perezhilton.com/2008-07-23-girls-gone-wildin-the-wnba

From The LondonCommons.net

I found this very interesting...

American Apparel's appeal to progressives?

Submitted by Mike McGregor on July 19, 2008 - 1:43pm.

tags:

Have you ever felt conflicted by the urge to support American Apparel's sweat-shop free practices and your reluctance to wear their gaudy clothes in public? I mean "Sweatshop-free" = good, and we always talk about voting with our dollars and supporting progressive companies right?

Well, don't worry about it. When you look a bit deeper, there's some pretty strong indications that American Apparel as a corporate entity isn't much more progressive then a rub-n-tug. By many accounts, AA's image is the fair labour and women's lib equivalent of a "Green Wash" (a "red wash" maybe?). Quite a few stories have popped up about allegations of American Apparel's union busting, degrading adds and the misogynist yuppie that runs it all... Google 'Dov Charney' and see what comes up. The guy is on his fifth sexual harassment lawsuit and his musing on domestic violence are interesting to say the least.

Don't take my word for it:

• http://clamormagazine.org/issues/38/aa/index.php
• http://www.inthesetimes.com/article/2270/

One Of The Most Humiliating Moments To Date

10:45am

July 17th, 2008

Wonderland Rd. and Springbank Rd.
London, Ontario

I'm going to Oakridge to pick up a couple of friends for a day in Grand Bend soaking up as little rays as possible while coated in Australian sunscreen.

As I'm driving I stop at a red light at Wonderland and Springbank.

A guy in a big black SUV taps on his window.

I roll down my window:

Guy: You've got something hanging out of your door.

Me: Oh? Thanks.

Guy drives off.

I open my door and am completely horrified.

I have been driving for the past 5 kilometers with my bra hanging out of my door.

And it's not just a little end of my bra. It's the whole damn thing.

Apparently in my haste to get to Grand Bend I inadvertently hooked my bra on the inside stitching of my bathing suit that I was wearing. And somehow didn't realize it until a random guy pointed it out.

Great. Just great.

As if being unemployed isn't destroying my self-esteem enough.

Perfect.

Perks of Unemployment

Reason #2:

Napping!

And not just that, waking up for a nap and thinking:

"Oh shit, I've slept through...ab-so-fucking-lutely nothing. More napping!"

I am building up my endurance to have the sleep schedule I did as a newborn.

Perks of Unemployment

Reason #1:

I can stay up late and watch The Daily Show and The Colbert Report.

Before I couldn't stay awake- now I don't have to worry since I'm not going anywhere.

It's good to laugh, rather than softly crying myself to sleep.

Ha! Ha! Ha!

Spelling Bee Moments...

I love this kid-

Just what a speller should be, having a good time.

Attack of the Frizz

I took this picture when I was underwater in the observatory in the Great Barrier Reef. It demonstrates my intense frizz that I had that day. What you can't see is how pale I am from barfing on the boat.

I post this today to show you what I have to live with right now.

I don't like being discriminated against because I have intensely frizzy hair that cannot be contained. Or rather can't be contained with any product that costs less than $3/milliliter.

Couple that with the fact that I'm out of a job as of tomorrow due to a lack of funding and I'm very, Very, VERY PISSED OFF AT THE DAMN HAIR PRODUCT INDUSTRY FOR MAKING ME FEEL LIKE SOME SORT OF BIZARRE ANOMALY WITH MY RED, CURLY, INCREDIBLY DRY, FRIZZY AND GRAYING (THANKS, DAD) WHACKED OUT HAIR. HAZEL, THE TRINIDADIAN HAIRDRESSER WON'T EVEN TAKE MY APPOINTMENTS ANYMORE, WHICH REALLY SHOULDN'T MATTER ANYWAY SINCE SHE GROSSLY OVER CHARGED ME ANYWAY FOR A CUT.

I think I may be projecting.

Anyway, I am taking donations of John Freida and Aveda.

Something to Ensure My Fear of Escalators Remains...

I have always had an irrational fear of escalators, but this video is intriguing.

It makes me want to take my tiniest friend and see if this really could work at Masonville Place.

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE?!

I stumbled across something deeply disturbing today.

Currently I'm going through my own teensy quarter life crisis. When one goes through these types of 'moments' it is not all that unusual to revert back to the good ole days when you felt comforted and safe. For me that means looking for nostalgia, and I have to cross one of my beloved childhood friends off the list. Strawberry Shortcake.

In the day and age where everything has to be hipper and more exciting more and more people/films/television shows are morphing this is almost an inevitability. Why expend some creative energy and make something new when we can destroy a beloved icon for emotionally unstable adults?

Couple that with the gross sexualized images of children (have we all not shuddered when walking past the Bratz dolls display?) and sacred icons of my eighties childhood are ruined...

I may be over reacting, but I really liked her bloomers.

Needless Machines

I'm a fan of the useless machine- not useless technology, that's different.

And recently I've rekindled my childhood interest in Rube Goldberg machines.

At engineer camp I was awarded the "Most Creative Ideas That Never Work" prize for my Rube Goldberg machine. This just further emphasized that engineering stifles creativity.