Monday, May 28, 2007

VALERIE PRINGLE WAS BEHIND MY WORK!!

Ok, so I was unloading my trunk and I saw CBC cameras behind our building.
To give you all a reference, I work at WAYS and my office is in a group home. The group home is on the Thames River, very beautiful.
As I rounded the corner I saw gleaming red hair.
And I don't want to hear that none of you know who Valerie Pringle is. I mean, who of us didn't have afternoon naps with Valerie hosting "Midday" in the background? The woman's a fucking national treasure.
I suspect Valerie was taping segments of her show, "Antiques Roadshow", which just recently made a stop at UWO.
And being my father's daughter (no matter how hard I try to fight it) I, of course had my new camera with me.
And being my mother's daughter (again, no matter how hard I try) I badgered the CBC staff with my RISE for Youth pamphlets and brochures.
I would love to be interviewed by Valerie Pringle. We could talk about sexual exploitation while bonding over being fair skinned and red haired (I like the term "red haired" better than "redhead", I know Valerie would, too).
I went upstairs to the group home portion of the house and started clicking away. I was taking pictures with one other boy who lives at the house. We instantly bonded.
I really need you people to understand how excited I was. I was literally jumping up and down. But that might have been from the paper fumes.
However, when I went to my department office, no one shared my joy. This just further proved to them what a dork I am.
But I know you understand.
Yippee!

YouTube.com!

It wasn't that hard, I actually figured out how to embed the videos into the blog, and they don't take forever to download.
Yea!
Check out the latest, and scroll down to see the Rachael Ray parody and the Jon Stewart "Crossfire" interview that made my frickin' year.

A Fair(y) Use Tale

Ever been confused when it comes to what exactly copyright law is all about?

I found this little video that explains it very well, and it includes all of your favourite Disney characters.

You must watch until the final chapter, I couldn't stop chuckling.

It's nice to see some academics taking on the big Disney machine.

Copyright is one of those laws that can be mysterious and intimidating at the same time for people.

Sunday, May 27, 2007

5 DAYS TO GO!

FACT #5
Jon Stewart has been in many movies you may have heard of; Half Baked, Big Daddy, Playing By Heart...
But did you know there are several movies Stewart was cut out of?
Almost Romantic: (a movie made with Janeane Garofalo, would have probably been the most sarcastic movie ever made)
Bird Meets Girl: (Jon was slated to play the mascot for the Baltimore Orioles who falls in love with a female sports reporter...maybe it's good that this was never released)
The First Wives Club: (apparently his ass made an appearance in the previews, but after focus groups saw the film they were unanimous in their hatred of Stewart in the movie)
Wavelength: (This was a movie almost made where Stewart played a sarcastic, bitter MTV jock who rips the head of the network another hole and gets transfered to a small radio station in Jamaica)
and...
A Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie (Stewart made a cameo and it was cut out, apparently John Cusack played an evil banker who tried to bring down David Arquette's music store...whatever. Now muppets are on my shit list)
"Everytime someone says 'Happy Holidays', an angel gets AIDS."
~ Jon Stewart

EXCLUSIVE! Elf: The Sequel!

Bad Elf - Elf Recut

Rumours are true!
Will Ferrell will star in a sequel to Elf!
A short trailer has been produced, and the ultra-secretive sequel will be set to hit theatres in November of 2007!
Check it out!

6 DAYS TO GO!!

FACT #4
Did you know that Jon Stewart is not only considered a hermit, but also a hypochondriac?
It's true.
Stewart's nickname is "Susceptible Boy".

Friday, May 25, 2007

This Bites


Ok, so apparently I don't know how to embed YouTube.com videos into my blog yet.

I blame YouTube.

In it's place, check out our nifty postcard.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Look What I Can Do!




Yippee! I can embed YouTube.com videos into my little blog!

I'm getting quite savvy.

My first entry is a parody video of my nemesis, Rachael Ray.

Here are a few reasons I dislike her:


1. Volume: Does this woman have any other volume than off or foghorn level? Seriously, she's way too loud. Her and Ty Pennington should get together and have shouting contests.

2. Intonation: I know voice probably doesn't merit two reasons, but seriously this woman sounds like a strangled goose.

3. Abbreviations: I have not made my dislike of Rachael Ray's abbreviations secret. She calls sandwiches 'sammies'. Who does that? When she says GB I want to throw garbage at her. And stoup has to be the stupidest thing I ever heard of. A stoup being "a cross between a stew and a soup". Stop it! And the most hated: EVOO. Don't know what that means? Don't worry, Rachael will fill you in, Extra Virgin Olive Oil. Tell me, Rachael, what's the point of using an abbreviation if you're going to say what the abbreviation means right afterwards?! You're ridiculous!

4. Herbs: Ok, please stop telling me to wash my herbs and put them in plastic bags when I get home from the store. Normal people don't have time for that shit.

5. 30 Minutes in Rachael Ray World = 45 Minutes In The Real World: Her meals are NOT 30 minute meals. That's a lie.

6. Dessert: Rachael readily admits that she's no baker. Yeah, thanks for the head's up. I think we understood that when we saw you make the 'melted ice cream sauce'. Seriously.

7. Recipe Titles: "You Won't Be Single For Long Vodka Cream Pasta". That's not clever. Or catchy. It's pathetic.

8. She Laughs At Her Own Jokes: Basically that. Couple that with numbers 1 and 2, and you've got an all out assault on the nation's ears.

9. Her "Talent": Can someone please tell the woman that carrying 15 items from the pantry to the cutting board is NOT a talent. It's a stupid way of tricking us to think that she's getting shit done faster.

10. Garbage Bowl: Incredibly wasteful. Also, see #3.

11. Pet Food: She teaches how to make dishes for your diabetic, overweight pets. Personally some of the stuff she makes I wouldn't serve to a dog.

12. Tag Line: Yum-O is not a tag line or a catchphrase. It's stupid. Stop putting it on t-shirts.

13. Eating Noises: Someone forwarded a video from YouTube.com of Rachael Ray making eating noises. It was 3 minutes long. I threw up in my mouth a little at 1 minute 23 seconds.

14. Oprah: Because of Oprah, now this woman has her own freaking show.

8 DAYS TO GO!


FACT #3
Jon Stewart's production company is called "Busboy Productions". It's named for Stewart's previous job as, you got it, a busboy.
It's tag sound is a glass being broken followed by "Oops, sorry."

Respondents Welcome On Vicarious Traveller!


Guess what? I finally took some time to look around my blogger and now I removed settings for comments on my blog.
So now anyone can leave a comment on my beautiful blog.
So now if I don't get comments I'll look like a big dork.
And coupled with the counter I just put on my blog I'm seriously looking desperate.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

I Can Count


Kk, I put a counter on the old blog...sigh.
Enjoy!

9 DAYS TO GO!!





FACT #2

Jon Stewart can bring down cable news by calling Tucker Carlson a dick.

If you haven't seen this yet, check it out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmj6JADOZ-8


Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Spelling Bee Napoleon Reciter



Through the magic of YouTube.com I accidently found a clip of the boy from South Carolina befuddling the Spelling Bee people when he quoted a Napoleon Dynamite line before spelling chinook.
Soo funny. The fam and I caught this by chance when watching the epitomy of stage moms and dads, the National Spelling Bee.
Check it out!

Monday, May 21, 2007

11 DAYS TO GO!

As some of you may or may not know, in 11 short days I will be seeing one of my heroes (along with Stephen Lewis and my mom), Jon Stewart LIVE in concert.
I hope you're all as excited as I am.
In commemeration for this amazing event I will be counting down the days with some very interesting Jon Stewart knowledge so that you're all informed when I go to see him at the Niagara Casinorama.
Fact #1
Did you know that Jon Stewart's original last name is Leibowitz? But do you know why he changed it to his middle name, Stewart (by the way, his middle name was spelt Stuart)? Contrary to popular opinion, he didn't change it because it was too Hollywood (by the way, this reason Stewart gave was in reference to a Lenny Bruce joke). The real reason Stewart changed his last name, along with his wife was because of a troubled relationship with his father, a physicist, left his mother, brother and him when he was 9 years old.
And there you go.
"On an average day 7 minutes of news happens. Yet there are currently 3 full-time, 24-hour news networks."
~Jon Stewart

Whose More Adorable?


Little Rachel woke up in time to attack Maggie when she came home from the Muskokas after I picked her up from the bus station.
I tried to get rid of her red eyes, but I'm still getting the hang of Picasa.
Rachel kept asking what Maggie's name was...I don't think she was too sure about the new hair.
She did give me a hug, if only to say to me, "Thanks Jessie, for bringing Maggie home."
Whatever.

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Hi!

Miss me? Here's what I've been doing!

Something I Don't Expect To See In Detroit...

A game of cricket.

Something I Would Expect To See In Detroit

A jail, downtown.

After the Rosemary Attack

I'm squinting, not smiling, from the pain.
Ok, it didn't really hurt, it was just a little prickly.

I Smell Like A Leg of Lamb

Right after I took this picture some vile woman hit me with a rosemary bush.

Pretty!

Too bad we couldn't take any across the border!

Mmmm

Mouth watering...If it weren't for the incredibly horrible karaoke next to it, this would be perfect. Luckily, a picture is worth a thousand words, not musical notes.

Detroit's Eastern Market!

Very cool market, I never knew was here...

Just walk through the chicken's...um...breasts...

The Best Travelling Companions!

They're great. I love 'em.
Lots 'o fun.

Our Teeny-Tiny Cabin


Here's how we travelled from Halifax to Montreal. Our cabin. Annie and I shared. Here's a transcript of Annie climbing the ladder to get to the top bunk.
Scene: Tiny train cabin, it's dark, lights are off, Jessie is in bottom bunk.
Jessie: 'Night Anne.
Anne: 'Night.
Annie grips ladder.
[Bang!]
Annie: Ow!
[Crashing, metal pinging]
Annie: Gah! Oh...Ugh...
[Bang!]
Annie: Argh...Ugh...Gugggg.....
[Bang! Crash!]
Jessie: Need some help?

Tee Hee.




I believe this is a good metaphor for our family dynamics.


Maggie loves to tease uncontrollably and hamming it up for a camera, Annie hates, well, a lot at the moment.

My Sisters.

Nice. This is how they walk downtown Halifax.

What's That Stain On Your Jacket, Annie?

It looks like bird poop.

Um...question...

Should someone let the people of Peggy's Cove in on the fact that it's May? I froze my ass off looking at their lighthouse.

White Knuckle Squeeze


Annie is freezing. We're waiting for Dad to stop taking pictures of the damn sunset.

Awaiting Her Gentlemen Callers


At the creepy B & B.

Are There Storm Waves? Wolverine Waves?


How can a wave be rogue? I know they can be dangerous, but it's the trajectory of a wave pretty self explanatory?
A wave, waves over, right?
Strange place.

It's Windy!

Nice. Taken at some lighthouse in Yarmouth, Nova Scotia.

She Sees A Seal...Maybe.


Taken in Digby, Nova Scotia where, apparently, there are absolutely no homosexuals.

Something Really Old Sitting On Something Really Old


Dad perched on one the first mill stones ever to be brought to the New World.
Ohh.
I wonder if they have a small pox infected blanket on display somewhere.

CHUG!

LOVE IT!

What The Hell Is That Smell?


Lobster caracasses? Seaweed? Rotting flesh?
Who the funk knows, but it was smelly in Halls Harbour.

Ahhh...


Ohhh

Seriously will never understand the Bay of Fundy. They should call it the Bay of Weird-y.

Very Rare.


Dad peeked out from behind his camera to pose awkwardly with his youngest.

Where The Hell Is The WATER?!

I sooo don't get the whole tide in, tide out thing. Tide is something I put in the washing machine.

Phew.

Water is back! Yippee!

POTATO!


Um. Yeah, potatoes.

Watch Out...She's Got A Camera And Kind Of Knows How To Use It


Grandma took this picture!
We kind of don't have tops to our heads, but we know they're there, so that's all that matters.
At least this was before the dancing.
I will never be able to listen to Three Dog Night's "Joy To The World" without giggling.

What's that on my dad's face?


This was what Dad did for the majority of the trip.
He was the Rodger family papparazzi.
He's very stealth.
Wanna find him? Just listen for the click, click, click, click.

Getting Her Drink On


I had no idea that Annie liked Whiskey Sours.
It's very sour.
You go girl.

We were off to a great start...


This is me on my birthday.
Why the long face?
The mean airport security made me throw out my full bottle of Aveda Curly De-Frizz because, apparently, they have something against those of us who are hair sensitive.
Screw you Ministry of Aviation.
You owe me $40. I don't care what the rules are. It was my fricking birthday.
Arse-holes.

Friday, May 18, 2007

Maggie's Baggage (The Literal Kind)


Maggie is crazy.
She was over packed. By a lot. Luckily, the VIA Rail people were very nice and let her box up her excess baggage.
We thought we would find it in London. Little did we know, we had to pick it up in Montreal, then in Toronto.

Look, Anne! Ireland!


I love my sister. She's very smart, very sweet and incredibly funny.
She thought she could see Ireland from Nova Scotia.

I don't care who you are, that place was creep.

OK, here's the bed and breakfast we stayed at in Yarmouth (it's spelt Yar-mouth, not Yar-mit).

It was very nice. But incredibly creepy. It was like staying in someones house. Oh yeah, that's because it was someone's house.

The people were very nice, very good food, very beautiful house (minus the creepy dolls everywhere).

And I'm all for supporting local economies. But seriously. I did not like it.

Sigh.

Peace Train...


I'm so proud of my little sister...fight the revolution!

Watch out...he's armed and dangerous!


This is my Papa at Fort Anne. For those of you who don't know Fort Anne is built in a valley. The hills were no match for Papa.

It was my birthday!




Ok, it's official. I'm old. And I love it.


I turned 25 on the 11th and had, what can only be described as a unique birthday (no complaints...yet).


I got a nifty new digital camera.


That's me, and in the corner is the light house on Peggy's Cove. You can't tell, because I'm so tough, but I'm freezing my ass off.

SHE GRADUATED! W00T!

Yea! Maggie graduated last weekend and it was FANTASTIC! She got a medal and everything.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

The Landlord

The Landlord



Alright, Will Ferrell has made, quite possibly the funniest short video I've seen in a while.

Yes, it is a tad inappropriate, I'm wondering if Child Protection Services has been called yet.

However, I guarantee that if you watch this video, you will be rolling on the floor.

Literally. It crazy funny.

And you should all bear in mind that Annie was the one that introduced this to me. She's the worst influence.

Friday, April 20, 2007

Trees Do Too Much Work With Breezes


Sorry, Annie.
Remember when we raked the backyard last week and gathered up every freaking pine cone from that stupid fricking tree that Dad should have cut down?
Well, it seems the tree was laughing at us, because when I came back from Sarnia it had crapped all over the backyard.
Pinecones everywhere.
I hate trees.
And that's not even because Oprah said she loved them.